When difficult things happen in life, you may find some friends are more willing to stick by you than others. This can be for many reasons and often, it’s not because they don’t care for you. It could be:
- They might feel scared themselves
- They might worry about doing the wrong thing and getting you into trouble
- They might be going through a hard time at home themselves
- They don’t understand what you are going through and are still working it out
Even though it might be upsetting don’t worry if this happens, stick with the friends who are about that you can talk to. You might find that the other friends will eventually let you know why they were acting distant. The important thing right now is you!
Will I have a normal life?
There’s no reason why you shouldn’t have a great, normal life. Many people face very hard situations like these but still manage to find good friends, loving relationships and successful careers.
Sometimes just talking about your situation with people you can trust can help you to deal with difficult emotions.
I feel like I’m on my own
No – you’re not alone! Many children and young people have been through similar situations and can tell you that things can and do get better. You can click onto the Young People’s Stories page to read and hear stories of other people who have experienced domestic abuse.
What can I do?
There are always people about who can help you. You can find more information about what help is available is on the Links page.
Many young people find speaking about their problems helps.
Speaking to someone else about personal things like difficulties at home can be hard. If you wanted to speak to someone, you could always start the conversation by saying ‘Can I speak to you about something I’m worried about’.
If you’re still not sure about what to say, you can always write it down first and practice when you’re on your own.
You can contact Shakti Children and Young People’s Services on 0131 475 2399 or email us at info@shakyouth.co.uk; we’ll be happy to listen and support you.
People like teachers and youth workers are usually happen to listen and will help as much as possible; if they are worried that you might be in danger, they may have to talk to another adult about your situation but it will always be a trained professional person like a social worker or family protection worker.
If you find it very difficult to speak to someone you know there are also phone and online services that can help, like ChildLine.
How do I keep myself or my family safe?
Remember domestic abuse is not your fault (no matter what anyone says to you). You might want to protect other people from getting hurt but it is not your responsibility to sort out the situation as it could be more dangerous. There are some ways to stay safe if you are frightened or worried: you can find these at the Staying Safe page.
